I think that a lot of women want a dude to fall head over heels and hopelessly in love with them in order to gain some sort of power over them. Perhaps it’s a form of insecurity. But if you happen to fall into the trap, these megalomaniacs then use your attraction/addiction to them in order to squeeze every bit of resources, protection, time, emotions and so forth out of you. Once they know they have it, then then mask falls off. You’re their slave and you’ll do anything to keep their validation and love for you around. Sex is no longer a pleasurable act, but actually becomes weaponized in order to get you to do what they want on their terms. Fail to comply with their needs, they’re out. Basically, they want to you be under the spell of being “in love”. Ironically, once they receive it, they lose attraction and respect for you. Don’t do it. Don’t let yourself fall in love.
Meanwhile, the thing we as men have at our disposal is that during the process of them trying to win you over, they’ll do damn near anything to get you to that state of mind. You have stay strong. During that time, they may show you some act right. But if they ever sense that you cannot walk away…..they’ve got u. They win. You can play the role to see how it might play out, but if you ever actually fall….the reality is….they got u……trapped. These modern women are like black widow spiders. They devour the males after mating with them. The males let it happen to them. In a similar sense, instead of devouring them during the mating process…..they devour men who fall in love.
Falling in love is like ingesting venomous honey flavored cocaine. It’s sweet yet addictive and poisonous. I’ve seen countless stories of hapless victims to this dangerous drug. It’s evidenced by them getting cheated on, disrespected, discarded by some of the most vile women imaginable, yet somehow rationalizing an irrational desire to want to be with them. I was once there and am still in recovery. Yeah, I once indulged in this sweet nectar, and just like most recovering drug addicts will tell you……yeah, I am a drug addict. They realize that this may be a life long condition or temptation despite it dragging their souls through the scorching hot jagged rocks of hell.
My lover once told me that if she were STBXW, she’d treat me the same way. That always stuck with me. I don’t think she really understood (or maybe she did) how I’d take that. I think she was trying to tell me to get over it in a way….. but still, the idea that sh’e’d also take advantage of someone who was in love with her is duly noted in my mind. Why take advantage of a person who loves you….even if you no longer reciprocate those feelings. I’d think you’d try to be respectful as possible….especially if they are trying to respect your feelings in the matter.
I suppose it’s not their problem, but for me, the idea that someone could simply fall out of love with you and due to that fact, they no longer value you, your friendship, your history, or you as a person isn’t something I’d consider as loyalty or faithfulness. In fact, I’d say it is a form of using someone. I don’t think my home girl understands that. She seems to also buy into the sentiment that once the “thrill” is gone (or she’s no longer happy), the relationship is over. Fuck that man. Relationships therefore are superficial and self serving and this isn’t imo a foundation to build a family upon. If not for the desire to have a family…..then what is the point the progression of titles in relationshps (friends, boyfrined/girlfriend, fiance, husband/wife) anyway. It’s just delaying the enevitable break up and making things much harder on everyone when it does happen.
I think most women mistake love for feelings of lust and attraction. And if someone better comes along and they think they’ll get it, they’ll drop u like a hot potato….or at the very least try it out by taking a “break”, cheating, or monkey branching. If it doesn’t work out, then they might come back temporarily…..however their respect for you is completelty gone by then.
Man, you just can’t trust your heart with a woman. She’s too fickle, self serving, whimsical, and victim to her own emotions. I really wish I had known this in the past. I wouldn’t have tried to give my heart out and I wouldn’t be in such a bad state of mind. My home girl doesn’t understand this, my lover doesn’t seem to understand this…..but i think subconsciously….it’s in their nature to desire that guy who is hopelessly in love with them. At least the guy they are attracted to. But if that guy does indeed fall for them, it’s also just a matter of time before they’re on to the next.
Knowledge is power. The application of knowledge is wisdom. No point in complaining about it. It is what it is. So in light of all of this my new motto is: Be cool, but stay frosty.