It could all be so simple

“But you’d rather make it hard….loving you is a battle, where be both end up with scars.”

-Lauryn Hill

I don’t know why so many women in the black community seem to think that their ‘temper’ or inability to control their mouth is a ‘cute’ or ‘quirky’ thing. I know so many women who humble brag about their tempers or anger issues. Many are also low key proud of the bullshit they be on when it comes to relationships. Songs like, ‘back up on my bullshit’ and so forth are anthems for them. They are materialistic, loud, overtly aggressive, and always ‘chasing a bag.’ They like to use current pop lingo/slang and seem to think that this behavior is somehow appealing. Their role models are Niki Minaj, Meg the Stallion, Rihanna, or Lizzo. They seem to think that expressing their feminine power is being overtly sexual and selfish.

They are loud, permiscuous, lacking morals, and overtly materialistic. I really don’t see the appeal. Yet, they wonder why men only want sex from them. I mean seriously, who the fuck wants to deal with all of that toxic ass behavior. To be honest, it’s a real turn off for me these days. When I see a woman who acts/dresses in a certain way, i am starting to bet repulsed by it.

The fake nails, fake hair, fake eyebrows, bbls, waist trainers, and so forth make them look like common street walkers or many times, transexual men. When I see a gang of them hanging around with these ho uniforms all loud and obnoxious makes me want to walk in a differerent direction.

I mean seriously, what dude really wants to wife a woman like that? My lover, despite all of my protests seem to think that this is what we like. She is a another example of someone experiencing cognitive dissonance when it comes to this. Even though she has toned down how she dressed since she’s met me…. At least when I can see what she’s wearing when she goes out…..she still seems to think that men like this.

I’m like the men who do actually like this ‘persona’ are probably men you wouldn’t want to get serious about. They all need to stop watching these reality tv shows because I’m starting to think that they think that this is real life. As a man, I’ve talked to men about the eyelashes, nails, and attitudes and the vast majority > 90% never say that they like those things. At the very least, the most understanding (blue pilled) say that it’s their right to wear what they want as long as it makes them happy. Still though, most of them won’t go so far as to say that they actually like it.

It seems that immoral, rachet, and loud women are the prototypes of what many females want to become. They are cold hearted and act like they want to be gangsters or female thugs or something. It’s like way too much masculine energy. It really pisses me off sometimes because these women want to act masculine, but don’t seem to understand that that the ‘loud mouthed’ arrogant guys who really be talking shit like that is either extremely rare or either a characature in movies and rap videos or locked up and in constant trouble.

Most dudes know that being reckless with his mouth or behavior (unless he’s really about that life)…. can get him into serious shit. He might get beat up, jumped, shot, arrested, or even killed if done to wrong person. You have a few ‘tough guys’ out there, but for the most part, we know that as men, that we have to show a certain level of restraint. you just aren’t going to be running your mouth at people on average….especially if you have something going for yourself. We will generally (normal guys, not street dudes) try to avoid voilence or situations where violence can occur. This isn’t out of fear of the next man per se, but it’s because the outcome isn’t worth it (win or lose). We’re talking, jail, possibly prison, having to kill someone, paying court fees, paying a lawyer, and bad things on our record. These things actually can hinder us and set us back a few years either emotionally or financially.

Yet, they want this bad boy who doesn’t care in the name of ‘feeling secure’ and protected. Protection from….what again….we live in a safe time. It’s all fun and games until he turns up on her….and then she gets to play victim. What a confusing time. It seems just easier to just not give a fuck as far as not caring what their feelings are. This way, you don’t have to capitulate to the pressure of walking that fine line. And ironically, it seems that the less you give a fuck, the more she likes you.

Then if you are foolish enough to take on the risk of catering to her in the name of ‘love’ you absolutley must walk in perfection. You’d better be making the right money, keep her entertained, fuck her good when she wants it, buy her nice gifts, take her on exotic trips, stay masculine (whatever her version of it is), and anticipate her wants/desires before she does. You better make good money AND somehow carve out enough time for her. Yet, maintain an air of mystery. Basically, become a suffering/ yet eager super man servant to her needs without coming across as too desperate for her. Then, should someone else come along who provides something you may lack…. or he happens to have better ‘game’, or promises her ‘better’ than what you can offer…..All of the dragons you slayed, your achievements, or your history together means nothing.

It’s your job to keep her ‘happy’ in this day of the promise of greener grass at every turn. She’s a princess who “deserves” the best of what life has to offer after all and fail to meet that expectation, then she feels justified to turn her back on you. Seriously, who the fuck wants to sign up for that? Your contributions, feelings, desires for the best for her mean absolutely NOTHING….even if you were foolish enough to put up with all her bullshit in the name of love. Maybe i have abandoment issues, but it does seem that way to me.

To me, it ain’t worth it. At least not to the point where I’d put my heart on the line again. If she ain’t making it easy, i ain’t chasing shit because often times, the juice ain’t worth the squeeze. Loyalty is a good man’s downfall these days. It truly is a case of ‘she’s never yours, it’s just your turn.’….that is of course, unless you pay the price….and there is still no guarantees with that. … and guess what, there is NOTHING you can do about it. But if you do happen to win….your prize?… keep doing it over and over day after day, year after year……hoping that you can maintain.

Yet they wonder why men don’t even try these days? I can’t say how many women are like this but I can say for sure that I don’t see women calling this bullshit toxic behavior out. Many men will at least ‘white knight’ or pretend at least just to get some ass. But you rarely if ever see women call toxic/terrible women out on their behavior….to the contrary, you see many of them endorse this behavior.

Not saying that all women are like this, but you can never really know because 1)there are a ton of chameleons out there (narc’s are notorious for that and 2)people do change. I wouldn’t recommend putting everything on the line for something so fickle and uncertain….but to each his own.

Truth or Red Pill Indoctrination?

They say that love is the thing that makes you accept the worst out of a person and still want to deal with them. In marriage, this gets exponentially harder as the lust factor fades, familiarity increases, and the pressures of life begins to mount up. You have to learn to accept your spouse, and their changes, for better or for worse for the sake of the family unit. Hopefully, that person’s changes won’t be deal breakers and you can grow together.

I’m starting to wonder if she hadn’t cheated / had an affair, could I have a taken the STBXW’s changes. I am at the point where it fees like she’s just not right for me. I wouldn’t marry her today if I knew her. Especially knowing what I know about her now.

But I have to admit that I don’t know if I’m really good for anyone in a relationship context.

However, I also have to admit that lately, I have developed an aversion to loving a woman. Ok, rather, being in love with a woman. This failed marriage and the internet has really changed my perspective of relationships and women in general. I always thought that in general they were fair minded, self sacrificing, oppressed individuals who just wanted a fair shake in love.

Today, I hold a wildly different view. It appears (at least based on my experience with STBXW and the view of many men social media) that they are actually selfish, materialistic, cold hearted, narcissists who only live for the principle of self. They are generally sneaky cheaters who only love what you can do for them and think that the universe revolves around them. They are ignorantly narcistic, virtue signaling, self victimized, spoiled princesses who feel that they deserve the lifestyle of the rich and famous. They can’t be wrong, like ever. In essence, many are like spoiled children with too much power and expect for men to bow down to them as they complain about said men, while at the same time feeling like they can treat men any way they feel…..often based on superficial values such as attractiveness or wealth accumulation.

I don’t know how many more videos I have to see of wives cheating on/ humiliating their husbands…..getting in a man’s face and talking shit, sometimes even hitting him, knowing he can’t really do anything about it…. or simply going online and complaining about the ‘lack of good men’ while always being attracted to ‘bad men’ who they already know are ‘bad’. They swoon for the attractive womanizer knowing his reputation in advance, seeing all the red flags, but when it blows up in their faces, they want to complain about ALL men……while either ignoring or friend zoning the guys (simps imho) who might actually treat them right.

But if they do choose one of those guys, they want money, more money, excitement, adventure. They want…no they feel that they ‘deserve’ a man who is attractive, wealthy, charming, understanding, passionate, a porn star in bed, and desired by other women while he only has eyes for her. And they should not settle for less than perfection (though often claiming that no man is perfect). These average women all think they are somehow above average and that average is somehow an insult these days. Too many think they are 8’s or 9’s and marriage material, no matter how shitty their morals, values, actions, and behaviors are.

For this, I blame the terrible ‘simps’ who tell women anything so that they can get laid. All up in their inboxes calling them ‘queens’ or ‘beautiful’. Noone is checking them and often the media panders and caters to them. Yet many still have the unmitigated gall to complain that the ‘patriarchy’ is oppressing them simply because they choose to engage with ‘bad men’ or would rather put the magnifying glass on they few bad men that actually oppose them.

They claim that men own most of the wealth when in reality it’s only a few men who own most of the wealth. Yet they conveniently ignore the fact that most men get raped in family court (often times for trying to do the right thing for their families)….most of the homeless people are men….. most suicides are committed by men….. 80% of divorces are initiated by women…. and let’s not forget that many of them feel entitled. The mere accusation of an average man doing something hurtful to a woman will often land him in hot water even before the evidence can be weighed out…..(yet they want to only spotlight high profile cases with powerful men….as if this is the norm).

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for ‘equal rights’ for women, but equal rights should not infringe upon a man’s rights to exist.

Oddly enough, despite all of these negative feelings I have against women in general. The ones that I encounter in real life seem pretty decent on the surface. With a few exceptions. I’ve pretty much discovered to avoid controversial topics or debates and let them talk without giving my true opinions if they are in opposition. I do believe that most women over 28 can’t learn anything and think that they know everything.

It’s like thoughts like “i don’t know” or “i could be wrong” never cross their minds. And it does really seem that it’s really pointless to have a real conversation or offer anything to the talk outside of what they already believe. Instead of listening, they want you to agree. If they start losing logically, they create “my truth” scenarios, deflect to different subjects, shut down completely, or become extremely insulting.

Perhaps I’m mysogynistic, but if it’s mysogyny to call it how I see it, then I’m guilty as charged. But imho, many women are just terrible…. at least in a relationship context. I couldn’t imagine being married to such a selfish, emotions driven, narcissistic, materialistic, cognitive dissonant, self absorbed individual again.

It really does make a guy only want them for one thing and as I get older, IDK if they are getting worse or if I’m just getting old….but I’m starting to wonder if that’s even worth it at times.