They say that all is fair in love and war. When winning comes at any cost, nothing is off the table. There are few rules. No morals. No ethics. Only objectives. In fact, morality it seems is a hindrance to winning. Ethics are for the weak who can’t see life what what it is. It’s a control mechanism that those in power use to manipulate the masses as a whole.
To win, is to have their heart while at the same time not giving yours in return. You want them to fall in love with you. It is to be in a position where you can walk away quite easily while they are stuck on you. You can easily replace them. They mean little to you as a person, but they are more of a tool to show how desirable you are, prevent lonliness, get validation, and sex. It’s simply an ego boost.
To achieve this, it seems that you must use trickery and deceit. That is, if you truly want them to love you. You must say and do whatever necessary to make them believe in the soul mate myth. You must be that person who validates them and make them feel worthy.
You build a pedestal beneath them……carefully as not to seem too desperate. You must make them feel loved while at the same time keep enough distance to make them think that they won you over with their ‘positive attributes’. You “get them”. You are star crossed lovers.
People are susceptible to gifts and compliments. Well timed jokes help. Feigning vulnerability at opportune times help seal the deal. Listening to them, not trying to help, but allowing them to talk, vent as you listen gets them to open up.
Never judge. Never try to fix. Only listen. Ask thoughtful questions. Be a therapist of sorts. But never judge. Judging is only for people who believe in soulmates. The goal isn’t to fall in love or be in love. It is for them to be in love, while thinking (or at least hoping) that you are.
You see, it’s better to be loved than it is to love. Selfish I know, but you cannot love a woman for real and expect her to stay in love with you. She isn’t your friend. She is your lover first. In order to keep yourself from getting too caught up, you must cheat….unless you’re naturally some sort of psychopath. It also helps you maintain an air of mystery.
You have to really be willing to walk away. And it’s a game of being able to have the next person and the next person and as many persons a possible to be in love with you at the same time. Keep this in secret though. They must wonder about your loyalty to them. It’s ok assure them with your words though your actions SUBTLY speak otherwise.
The fear of losing you creates a sort of desperation on their end. It’s like a cat playing with a string or ball of yarn. Once it has the string or yarn figured out, it gets bored and moves on to the next shiny object.
They can sense discrepancy. They have to sense it…..otherwise, they get bored. But Often times, if they are too deep, they can’t walk away. It’s as if the pain bonds them closer to you. The curiosity keeps them engaged. As they try to regain that “admiration” you had for them. Or resolve that conflict of what they think they believe and what you tell them.
Lying also keeps their mind on you. It makes them question their own sanity. It makes them think about you more often as they worry if you’re telling the truth. Are they really insecure. You wouldn’t cheat….Would you? Don’t tell stupid lies. Avoid them as much as possible, but also, don’t lie so well that they never figure it out. Everything is strategic. It’s to keep them second guessing themselves.
Keep them off balanced. Be hot and cold. Give gifts. Don’t answer calls all the time. Show desire, but not desperation. It’s a balancing act of keeping them on the line. Never too much and not too little. Well timed lies mixed with words of encouragement. Innuendoes. Much progress can be made after a great sex session. It’s not about sex. It’s not about desiring them as a person. It’s only about making them fall in love with you.
Remember that it’s better to be loved than to love. Only simps fall in love with anyone. You lose your power. They cannot respect you if you love them back with your heart. You say it, you sound convincing. You play the role as necessary. But you never mean it.
You enhance the effects by creating drama. They get bound by trauma. Break ups and make ups. They desperately try to figure out “how do you think that.” or “Why did you do that?” They may question your intelligence at times. You do just enough to push them off, but not away. You string them along. At least until you’re done with them.
It’s a dirty game. It’s not for the faint of heart. Only suckers love. It’s only about validation. People with “good intentions” get eaten alive out here. The sheep get devoured by the wolves.
The secret to love is to never fall in love. It doesn’t exist. It’s just a chemical addiction that…. if played skillfully enough…..you can voluntarily induce into others while avoiding the same. You’re a drug dealer who doesn’t use his own product. You want to create infatuation in them while avoiding it yourself. Do what you will with it. But playing the game sloppy is an indication that you’re losing the edge.
Being “in love” is involuntary. Loving someone is. Otherwise it’s simply infatuation. But if you can induce the feeling in yourself strategically, on occasion, you can use mirror neurons to your advantage. Don’t overindulge. These are powerful chemicals. Just remember that it’s just a game and do what’s necessary to prevent yourself from getting addicted.
We all play this game on some level. Many just get caught up in the role and play it with our ego. Remember that. You lose the game if you fall harder. It’s just a game. Not real. It’s a myth like Santa, the gods, and most heroes of the past.
There is no love. Only attraction and honeymoon phase energy. Lust and seduction. Attraction is more powerful than love to most people these days. It’s why money and looks is greater than character.
It’s a dark, dirty game. Those willing to do whatever to win are the victors and those who don’t know will always lose.
Narcs have an advantage as this comes naturally to them. They’ve had YEARS of practice. Empaths must overcome their nature to love. BUT Empaths, should we choose to embark on this journey have the capacity to play it much better as we intuitively KNOW how to induce love on a deeper level.
We have to start leveraging our strengths. Overcome our pride. And learn to shut out that sense of morality. Not an easy task……I’d say as difficult as it is for a Narc to stop being so damned selfish.
Either we play the game or get played in it. They’d probably do it to you as most people believe in their own personal happiness by any means anyway. You mean nothing to them other than a sense of validation or security. Remove that and they’re cheating with the next person who can provide that for them. REgardless of your intentions. Regardless of you “proving” your love to them. Regardless of whether or not you truly love them back. A woman would rather be a player’s whore than a good man’s wife. Or better yet, she’d rather be both. Which side of the fence do you want to be on?
We live in a sick, fucked up world. The faster we acknowledge this….the better off we are. Don the cloak of the unassuming sheep to get their guard down. Douchey, I know. But in the end, the douche always gets the girl. The person who cares the least has the most power. This isn’t some disney fairy tale. A woman cannot respect a man who doesn’t have this power over her. She loses attraction once she KNOWS she got u like that. Only simps love a woman with their hearts. He is bound to get broken by her.
You must lose that idea of a soulmate. They don’t exist for men. And is only an illusion. But most women prefer fantasy over reality. Never invest more (money, time, resources) in a woman than you’re willing to lose. This is a game and you will win some and lose some. But the key is to not get so caught up as to make it your identity. Love ain’t real. But….
All is fair in love and war.