There seems to be a sort of gender war going on and noone really knows what the hell is really going on.
On one hand, you have so many single women (in the atlanta metro area anyway) who say that good men are hard to find. On the other, you have a ton of single men who say “women ain’t shit.”
Are all the “ain’t shit” people ruining /scaring all of the decent people off the scene?
Here’s the way that I see it. There could be a way that both sides are right. It can be summed up quite simply.
Women are horrible at picking men.
They say that a person is only as faithful as their options. I believe that this is partially true. The more options one has, the harder it will be to maintain faithfulness over time. Actually, it’s options and opportunity and that’s just the beginning.
The red pill idea of the 80/20 rule perfectly explains why women think that most men “ain’t shit” and have a ton of options when it comes to women. For those who don’t know, it’s speculated that 80% of women are attracted to only %20 of men. Or you could also say that 20% of men are getting 80% of the women out there.
Chances are very high that the women complaining are dealing with or are interested in a 20% man. The other 80% are essentially invisible to them. Those guys are the friends, neighbors, co-workers, acquaintances, etc. who pass them on a daily basis, but who aren’t attractive enough (physically, financially, or personality wise to garner a second look.)
20% men aren’t necessarily horrible people overall, but there are certain personality traits that are very common in this demographic. These often (but not always) include narcissism (often seen as high self confidence), machiavellianism (seen as dominant/ “big dick” energy”), and psychopathy (seen as cool under pressure, social intelligence). You could research “dark triad to further clarify these traits.
In an ironic twist, the very things that “attract” them in real life are the very things that end up burning them in the end. It’s the classic moth being burned by the flame analogy.
What’s even more confusing (to them and many blue pilled men) is that women often cannot or will not admit that they are actually attracted to men with those characteristics.
If therefore, they find themselves mostly attracted to and in love with men who share those characteristics, then it’s really no wonder that they think that most men ain’t shit. It’s what they experience so it’s what they know.
They assume that most men are 20% men because they men they’ve dealt with on that level are 20%men. Again, keep in mind that the 20% man has no problem with getting women’s attention, thus cheating isn’t really a problem for them. In fact, the characteristics that attract them in the first place is the reason why they have no problem with cheating/lying/running around.
Outside of the 20% are the leftovers:
There is another segment of men who aren’t in the 20% who would probably do the same things that a 20%er would if they had the chance. These men are usually blue pilled simps, I’d say that they are overall average guys. I can’t be sure what percent of the population that is, but i’m pretty sure the number is high. Let’s call them self average joes.
You can tell these guys by asking their expectations of women. They usually follow the instathots on instagram. They are the guys who’ll do anything to get sex. They lie to get sex. They’ll sleep with their friend’s girls. They have no problems with sleeping with married/taken women. Don’t mind being a side dude. They are the thristy dudes in every baddies dm. They fall for the thirst traps. They don’t realize that they are lacking, but will cling on with dear life to a woman if they get one while cheating/or attempting to cheat in the process. Like the 20%, his confidence is really high. That alone is enough to get him some women.
Another subset of guys are the incels. Short for involuntarily celibate. These guys are socially awkward, have bad hygiene, and poor dispositions. They may or may not have confidence, but either way, they are often ignored based on either their sense of entitlement or victim mindset. They are, for the most part, unattractive overall in both appearance and personality. While many may be smart/intelligent or excel in certain areas, they are just off putting to be around. The more confident they are (often armor for their insecurities), the less they are willing to self reflect. They are quite vocal in their judgement of others while they seem to ignore their own flaws.
Another set is the once bitten twice shy men. I think this is where the MGTOWS and redpill camp come in. They’ve been burned by marriage or relationships. I think that many good guys are in this camp. They were probably just like the average joes in stature, but they really wanted to be good guys in their relationships. These are the family guys who’s girl ended up breaking their hearts. They are usually more introspective and laid back, but are generally honest and fair. The thing that makes them unattractive is that they are boring and can be quite predictable. These are the men that women say that they want, but end up cheating on.
After being broken hearted, these guys tend to take a hands off approach to romantic relationships. Many are the emotionally unavailable types, but can be quite loving and charming when together with a woman. They don’t have all the ‘game’, but are decent overall. These guys would make good fathers and often good lovers, but something (too boring maybe?) cause women to end up losing attraction to them.