Tumblr officially banned porn about a year ago.  It was really my main source of looking at it, so it really wasn’t too hard to give it up.   Today, I stumbled across a few porn threads somehow and after a few minutes down the rabbit hole so to speak,  I realize that porn is evil.

My physiciological reaction to seeing a woman’s naked body is insane right now.   It might be due to the fact that I’ve been practicing semen retention.   Basically, no masturbation.   Since my lover is out of town, that means no sex at all, even on the weekend.

I could practically feel the dopamine surge through my brain as I saw these ass naked women spread.   It reminds me of why we men simp so hard for women and do the most for them.    There truly is power in the pussy.

For me, that’s enough porn.  I’m good.   I don’t like the feeling of not being in control of my body.   Unbridled lust is a reminder of how weak we as men are.   I see why men in the middle east are prefer to keep women as clothed as possible.

Yoga pants, sun dresses, tight jeans, halter tops, bikini’s and all of that definitely makes me feel a certain way.    Especially on a beautiful woman.   Yet in my recovery from being totally crushed by one, I have a weird sensation of lust with an impending feeling of danger.   The fast heartbeat isn’t just pleasure, it’s also like a sense of danger.   As in keep my desire in check because THAT can kill you if you dwell too long in that place.

I also saw a short video with the rapper Cardi B explaining how to do fellatio.  In it, she talks about how she deep throats a guy.  As she explained, there were cutouts to different men giving bug eyes and double takes indicating that they were somewhat mesmerized.

At one time, I would have been on the bandwagon, giving the same type of response…..but this time, all I saw were a bunch of simps who give thots way too much attention.   It’s really not that serious and even if it is, why is it that we as men are taught to check our emotions, except when it comes to women overtly expressing their sexuality.

We’re taught to be fools when it comes to sex.    And as fools, we are under the spell of pussy.   Yes it feels great.  It’s feels amazing.  Yet to have it at the focus of our goal is the downfall of many a men.   Society seems to want to bash you for not giving a damn….or saying that it really isn’t that serious.    Let them eat cake.    Meanwhile I have to reprogram myself … at least temper myself to overcome my lust and desire.

Food is great, yet we don’t go about acting all stupid when we see a hamburger or something.   It’s somehow ingrained into our social dynamics that it’s ok to be a damn fool over a fat ass and cute face.   I’m judging myself on this one as well, but to know better is to be better.    At least in practice.

I’ve learned that in life, it is an abomination against the MOST HIGH for a man to actually fall in love with a woman.   Sure, we can love with our minds, but never with our hearts.  We are to save that for God or either our purpose.

Fall in love with your purpose…..I like that.

I’m thinking that one of the keys to take your eyes off the MOST HIGH or HIS purpose for you is lust.    The love of the pussy is the downfall of many a great man.  These beautiful women and the biological rush they give you can serve as a trap if you’re not on the right track.

Without having a purpose, she can easily become your purpose and that was my downfall with my wife.   I’d guess that of many of the shiftless/simple men here in America also fall victim to this.    Sex is all around us and no one warns us about the impending doom that’s inevitable should we focus on it.

Maybe this is why I my mind is warning me of danger when I see that bad ass ig model twerking.   It’s a reminder to not get caught up in the song of the sirens lest I lose my way, crash my ship, and end my life.   Hmm?   There’s seems to be more to that greek story after all.