No harm no foul

Redpill awareness saved me.   This weekend, me and my ‘friend’ went out and she suddenly started acting….differently.   The night started as usual, but halfway through, she started acting irrationally, started an argument over something trivial and was distant for the rest of the evening.

I knew that the argument wasn’t about the specific thing (it wasn’t that serious), but something deeper was at hand.   We haven’t spoken in the past few days and I realize that she needs space to sort out whatever the hell she’s going through.

In the past, I would have chased, pressed her to find the real reason, and tried to make a case.   Wisdom has taught me that chasing would be the worst thing to do.  Trying to fix things isn’t always the best course of action.   Either she wants to deal with me or not.   Maybe she is fed up.  Maybe she wants to explore other options which is fair.   Maybe she’s stressed about something else.  Or maybe she needs space.   Maybe God intervened and was like “damn dude enough is enough.”  I’m still technically married after all.

TBH, I hope the best for her.   I miss her like crazy and it’s taking a lot to not text her to check on her.   But for me, I’m done with pursuing or trying to fix those type of relationships. She can deal with me if she wants on her own time.

I’m not really as hurt as much as I thought I would be.   I’m happy for that.  My ego isn’t hurt.  I’m not mad at the fact that she started a fake argument to dismiss me.   I am aware of women’s nature and it’s just what they do.   Foul, yes, (huge red flag), but i wasn’t harmed as I’m not ignorant to how this works now.

Maybe I’m growing.   While she is amazing in many ways, I knew that it couldn’t last forever.   Perhaps understanding this ‘relationship’ was like a vacation, I realized that sooner or later, the trip would be over.  While I don’t think that we’ll never speak again.  It wouldn’t be the end of the world if we didn’t.   No hard feelings.    I’m thinking that this is how future relationships should be.   It’s better to be friends, even if the ‘benefits’ fall away.


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