Red Pill confusion

After reading and absorbing as much Red Pill content I can stomach, I’m still somewhat on the fence about how I feel about women’s nature.   My youtube recommendation list pretty much reinforces the belief that the vast majority of modern women are not worth being in relationships with.

If this is indeed true, then guys who really want to treat a woman well are really just asking to be cheated on or left.    I really don’t want to believe this, but WOW…..watching all the video of ‘side dudes’ stories really scare me.   Women are brutal.   Cheating is rampant.

It’s almost like you have to expect your woman to cheat on you.  To that I say, what’s the point of a relationship anyway.   Love only means that “you make me feel good right now.”  to her.

It is therapeutic to know that I’m not the only husband this happened to.  Looking back at my behavior, I was simping too hard.  I shouldn’t have expected unconditional love.   I should have been more demanding.  I should never have put myself in a position where it would hurt so bad to leave.   I should have been always on the lookout and possibly should have cheated to keep her on her toes.   I should have taken full advantage of the situation while she was “in love” with me.

But I don’t want to believe that most women are like that.   At the same time, I can’t put my heart on the line again.   It would be like quitting an addiction only to get addicted to another drug.    I hate the idea that I have to keep my eyes out.  I’m a one girl type of guy.  I hate lying to people.

So the only recourse of action is to improve myself, but never get into a serious relationship.    I have to make sure that I have at least two women so that I won’t be so desperate to hold on to one.

The goal is to make more money, work on my personality and body and be as attractive as possible.    I have to learn to ‘talk’ to women and put myself out there.  I am feeling a little better these days, but I’m not really stoked about going out with the sole purpose of meeting women.

I like sex like the next man, but apparently, not enough to put myself through the trouble of going out and hunting for women.    Understanding a woman’s true nature does help when I talk to them, but at the same time, I just can’t seem to act accordingly.    I’m still ‘nice’.   I rarely see any women I’m attracted to enough to put myself out there.   I know I need to practice, but at the same time, I am developing this hatred towards them.

Don’t get wrong the ass, tight clothes, sun dresses, all look good to me.  I can now see how many men just see them as objects.   I used to want to find someone I could connect with.   Truth be told, it’s what I really want.   But that’s dangerous.

I can’t even look at my wife the same.  I don’t know how we could ever resolve things between us.   They say that you can either understand women or love them, but not both.    Understanding their nature makes it damn near impossible to trust them.  Without trust, what do we have?  In our community, if a woman cheats on you and gets away with it, it’s like you deserve it.    The unspoken rule seems to be like “oh nigga, you didn’t know that these hoes aint loyal”.

 

 

 

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