Empathic men are often lumped into a category with ‘nice guys’. We’re often seen as weak and feminine. I’d like to challenge the notion that women are really the more empathetic sex. Especially in the black community.
Most men are pretty simple creatures. We are a lot like dogs. We just want someone to love us, care about us, treat us with respect, and give us sex. Obviously we want to be attracted to her, but personality points are a huge bonus for us. In general, if a woman is decent all the way across the board, we can love her. Most women in the south are fat. If they’d just hit the gym and stop being so damn difficult, they’d make it so much easier on themselves.
Women on the other hand are complicated. Their standards for good guys are through the roof. Especially if she’s decent looking and up. He must be an entertainer, provider, ambitious, successful, and decent looking. He must have education, be world traveled (or at least be interested in traveling the world), always confident about everything, have the right things to say, make her laugh often, still be the security, confidant, leader, listener, … etc. If he drops one ball, then he’s not perfect and because of all the males trying to get at her, he either better tighten up or she becomes miserable thinking that the better male is just around the corner and he’s holding her back.
Women are ruthless about this. She doesn’t want a man to exhibit any sort of weakness in any of these areas or else she begins to feel sympathy for him. She ‘needs’ these things and if a guy can come along and provide one or more of those things her man doesn’t, she’ll entertain him. She may not have sex, but it really depends on where her man is dropping the ball. This guy becomes an orbiter and when the inevitable bumps come in, he’ll also be glad to sit there, listen to her ‘problems’ and tell her that she deserves better.
They like thugs because they are fun and will entertain them because of that. Many don’t realize how powerful sex can be and get emotionally attached. These guys take their validation by mistreating them and they get stuck with trying to get it back from him. It’s a fucked up, but effective game and I can’t be mad at it.
Good men often fuck up because we give them too much validation without making them earn it. We care too much about what they think about us. It makes us come across as needy. Nice guys give way to much validation and expect reciprocity. It doesn’t work that way with validation.
The danger in thirsty simps and players overinflating women’s egos is now that the expectation for a really good guy is through the roof. Women literally can’t be satisfied with the average guy. It really doesn’t matter how well you treat her. In fact, we’d be better off by going the bad boy route, only we can’t because most of us will bore her with philosophical, self help, markets, sports, or politics talk. We’d have to create drama so that we can keep them entertained and you have to ask yourself if it’s really worth it to get her, let alone keep her.
Pickup really seems to be the best thing for the average good guy to learn. This puts us in a position to get the girl, but not have to worry about keeping her long term. I don’t if it’s possible to keep any woman happy enough long term unless you’re a millionaire, but even then, you see basketball wives divorcing their husbands every day. Look at Kevin Garnett. We just have to be careful understand that she loves us only for our ‘game’ and not really for us. We can’t afford to fall in love and invest. I’m not saying to be totally dishonest and lead her on, but often, if you study women long enough, and pickup, you realize that you know women better than they know themselves.
Pickup is the perfect example of how formulaic approaches can work in the majority of women out there. It shows why a few men get a majority of the women while the average guy is fighting for the scraps. As men, we have to wake up and realize that we are living in the matrix. We’ve been taught that women were a certain way, most women still think that they are that way, but in reality, they aren’t.