I came across a video this weekend where a MGTOW guy was explaining how the sexual market place is so skewed now that it’s impossible for most people to have functional relationships. In a nutshell, it’s our faults as men. Our thirst and desire to say and do anything for sex has led women to overestimate their ‘value’ on a 1 to 10 scale.
SMV is a pickup term that means sexual market value. In other words, where do you rank on a 1 to 10 scale. I personally give myself a 7 or possible 8. I’d go as low as a possible 6 to account for personal bias. I’ve been told that I’m handsome and funny more than a few times. I have a decent career. I make pretty ok money on my side job. I believe I’m pretty smart. I’m not too socially awkward. I work out 3 to 4 times a week so my body is in pretty good shape. I look young for my age. I’ve also been ‘thanked’ a few times for having a good conversation with people. (weird, but I drive lyft on the side and it works wonders to help with conversational skills). I’m a pretty decent human and considerate to my SO.
That said, I’m not a 10. My confidence isn’t self delusional. I do feel nervous at times. I’m not wealthy. I pay my bills and have enough left over to do some things. I’m not short, but I’m not quite 6 feet. I’m not the most charming or funniest person in the room, but I’m ok with that. I’m never the most awkward either. I’d say that a 7 is about right for me. Personally, I’d feel that I’d go for a 6,7, or 8 female. I don’t even want a 9 or 10.
The problem I think is that most women believe they are 8’s or 9’s. Increasingly more will claim that dime status. This is where we as men have created this ugly frankenstein monster called the modern western woman.
Our thirst for sex causes us to say and do anything for it. We will lie and tell average women how beautiful they are in order to get laid. We will tell them how wonderful and awesome their personalities even though many are boring as shit. Not saying it’s necessarily a bad thing, but we lie in order to get in her good graces. We won’t call them out for their bullshit because we fear that they won’t sleep with us if we do. We put up with their bullshit because we fear that they won’t sleep with us if don’t.
Our own lack of self control and discipline when it comes to who we’ll sleep with got us here. We can easily compartmentalize sex and have it without getting emotionally attached, but that’s why need to have more self control. Our smv scale for them is skewed because physical beauty seems to be the main prerequisite. Their view of themselves are skewed because they believe the lies we tell.
We don’t hold them accountable for being selfish or vain. They are generally way more emotional and we don’t hold them to task for being ‘bitchy’. In fact, we are ‘wrong’ if we call them ‘bitches’ even if they are acting like one. We will sleep with the most evil, vain, arrogant, stupid woman as long as she gives up the goods. She doesn’t even have to be all that good looking.
In general, a man that’s a 9 or 10 will have no problems sleeping with a woman that’s a 5 or 6 and for him, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel. They will still fall for it and swear that the lust is love.
Women on the other hand will typically not go for a guy that’s below their level. The problem is that their level is usually over inflated by the ‘options’ she has. Not only will guys on her level want her, but guys above her will give her the time of day sexually.
It would be easier for a woman that’s a 7 to get laid by a 9 or 10 than a man that’s ranked equally. Life has taught most of us men, that we must be aware of what our number is and choose accordingly. Because it’s easier for a woman to get laid by that 9 or 10, she will often feel like she’s settling for her 7 (even though she is ranked the same).
Of course this scale is somewhat subjective, but there is a lot of evidence in for this theory.
It’s been said that 80% of women go for 10% of the men. While roughly 60% of men go for 40% of women. In other words if you put 100 men and 100 women in a room, 80 of the women will only be interested in the same 10 men. 60 of the men will go for the same 40 women.
A man could be an 8, but statistically, a 6 woman won’t even give him the time of day holding out for that 10. Keep in mind that she’s competing with women that are 9’s and 10’s. She’d rather be a top 10% man’s side chick than settle for a top 20% man’s love….. herself being a 60% woman.
In the real world, the 9 and 10 men are usually the players. They have the most swag, sex appeal, and sometimes money. They will actually settle for a 6 or 7 because they know they can get away with stuff and she’ll deal with it because she will swear she’s in ‘love’. I’ve learned that while most women will say that they just want a guy who’ll treat them right, they will compromise that as long he’s rich, attractive, and can make her feel a certain way…. (horny).
Meanwhile, Mr. 7 better bring his A game every time and bend over backwards to ensure she’s ‘happy.’ His margin of error is slim to nil and even if he is able to walk the tightrope, juggling knives while walking backwards, he better make sure to throw a spinning hop in there every now and to make sure she doesn’t get bored. It doesn’t matter how much he listens, love her, or is considerate, as long as Mr. 9 or 10 might give her a chance to ‘win him and change his ways’, Ms 7 feels like she’s ‘settling’ for Mr. 7.
The worst part is that Ms. 7 doesn’t necessarily bring anything more to the table than Mr. 7. In fact, I’d go so far to say that it’s often times less.
The only way to short circuit this it seems to game her or be emotionally manipulative. The narcissist excels in this arena.
You can sometimes pretend to be a 9% or 10% by selling her a dream and essentially lie to her. It does appear that the delusions of grandeur of the ‘overconfident’ man seems to work as I know guys who don’t have anything going for themselves can trick women (usually 7’s or 8’s) into giving them everything. The key is once you have her, you have to start with the narcissistic games.
Narcs have figured out how to pad their number and keep women hooked using manipulative tactics. These guys usually wreak emotional havoc on females, sometimes give them bastard kids, and make them end up mistrusting men in general. The women then becomes ‘damaged’ goods and make it absolute hell on the the average/slightly above average guy to get through. Even if they do manage to get out, their resolve not to ‘settle’ becomes even sharper. While they may appreciate the 7 , they are more resolute get the man they ‘deserve.’ What they don’t understand is that because of the kid(s) and the emotional issues, they are really no longer 7 themselves and the only thing that makes them a 7 is their looks (if they were able to maintain them).
Welcome to America gentlemen. The place where the average woman believes she’s a beautiful princess and entitled to a wealthy prince. The land where lust is love. Where the heart is fueled by lust (of the flesh, the eyes, and the gut). And everyone is encouraged to chase this heart regardless of where it leads you.